Posted in Dating

If he is not calling or texting; he is not into you

In January 2014 I started seeing someone who currently I am not seeing anymore. I have known this man for 2 years off and on as we communicated only by online, phone, and text communication. I met him for the first time right after the New Year and we started seeing each other as time would allow us both. I have to admit I enjoyed his kisses and massages very much.

Then in the third week of us seeing each other he states he has to leave to Texas for a job that will last 3-4 months. Right up until he leaves I am  telling him how much I am going to miss him. I make time for him; to spend as much time together as possible thinking he is feeling the same way. He assured me we would talk often while he is gone, and text daily as we have been. I told him I didn’t want him to see anyone while he was gone. He assured me things had changed for him too and that he would miss me as well.

The day he leaves Friday, we are talking and texting. The next day or the first official day he is there….nothing. So I text and try to call him. Nothing. Then on Sunday morning he texts with “good morning”.  We talk shortly after that and I am upset with him since he has not answered his phone or texted. He ends up hanging up on me stating he doesn’t like confrontation. I was stunned. I texted him telling him he has hurt me by his behavior.  He texts back that he will text me when he stops as he was heading to the local Zoo and that he was not in contact because he has had the “shits” all day. LOL yea that’s what he actually texted.

He has yet to text or call me since that last text on Sunday.


I honestly don’t know what to make of a man who leaves for work in another state and all the sudden does not call or text anymore. This after calling me everyday and texting all the time, along with being intimate. Dumb me for believing when he said he was not like other men.  One word: PLAYER. It seems like this is what is in the dating field lately. I wonder if anyone wants to be with someone permanently anymore. Romance seems to be dead as I have yet to meet a man who will go to great lengths to, even in the smallest way, spoil me. Sigh…

What’s sad is I somewhat allowed this kind of behavior. But I am learning with each PLAYER how to handle the next. Doesn’t matter whether you are thin or fat, this is simply how men are to ladies. Grant you some men will hang around longer if they have nothing better to do with their time as being with someone keeps them from being totally alone. But lets face it, most men only want to play around and if you are not giving them sex they won’t come around.

I know not all men are like this. I do know we live in a culture now that being single has surpassed being married. Whatever happened to two people, a man and a woman, staying together and making it work?


I posted general information on Facebook that I am no longer seeing this man. All the sudden other men are asking to date me and be given a chance to get to know me. Since I was never taken by this man I am going to continue to date. One of these men contacts me and was a previous suitor that only wanted sex; even though he has adamantly stated he wants a best friend. LOL Yea I seem to attract them.

Bottom Line Ladies:

If he is  not calling or texting; he is not into you.

If he is not wanting to spend every single second of his free time with you; he is not into you.

If he is not romancing you and doing everything to make you smile; he is not into you.

Nothing will stop a man from being with you when he really wants to be with you. Men are simple like that.


I am the person who gives excellent advice. Yes, I am that good! I am a writer, a mom, a Nana (yes hard to believe I know!), a professional, educated, and has the ability to look at anything objectively. I write about everything and anything. I do this because there are many facets in my life. I am also a Coffee Lover and that alone makes me awesome. ~Me

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